When I was a school age child, I wasn’t the best at making friends! Let me elaborate, real friends, not ones you play with at recess or just the ones you sit next to and are friendly, but real friends. I didn’t have a play date friend that I spent my years with. Well as the result of that was when in high school i started to hang with the wrong crowds to feel in the right place. I ignored all logic and authority (even god’s saying that it was wrong). In which I have stated in a pervious post of Awkward in Friendship. I thought those “friends” were good friends because they had my back for a while then they didn’t, well that’s not a friend.
I know what you’re saying Get the point Alexis, Why are we talking about this again! Well let me tell you why. Last night I had a ah-ha moment I was watching two sermons done by Pastor Micheal Todd from Transformation Church. One was talking about the missing link the other was part two of that talking about a godly friendship and the roller-coaster ride friendships have!
Why does this relate to my little flash back, well lets flash forward to now, I am turning 24 and just now started to gain friends, godly friends and what he was preaching helped me realize some things with those friendships I have. So lets dive in:
In the first video he talked about the missing link and that to fulfill purpose you need four things; Relationship with God, Your gifts, Answering Gods Call, and Godly Community. I’ll Link the sermons so you can listen because I am not posting the whole thing. The last thing that was needed was the ah-ha start for me, It wasn’t till I started my relationship with god that I gained more out of things than when I was a lone wolf. I started to see me and who I was, well then I then started seeing my gifts. I am a mother, writer, and photographer. Now I haven’t answered the call yet because I’m still in my gifts stage as far as I know however along the way I have gained godly community.
Now lets Talk about the second sermon, he talks about the rollercoaster ride that comes with godly friendships or what to look for I guess. All the things to expect from that. Each part of the rollercoaster is something different in the relationship, and I will link that video as well so you can watch it, highly recommended!
Anyway, getting to the point, I am a social butterfly and often I find myself not wanting to commit to the rollercoaster of a godly relationship (or just relationship) because I hear voices of the enemy making excuses for me. Well after I seen this I now know more on what I can do to further the relationships I’m starting because it’s needed not only for me but what God wants. He doesn’t want us to be alone!
I have some girls I meet with from my church and other groups that I now would consider in line with me for that commitment of the rollercoaster ride of friendship. I want to commit and go through life with them because I need godly community.
There are a few fears that I have always had with the whole friendship thing, one: well what if they don’t want to befriend and go on the ride with you, two:well they already have a bestie or besties’ and established friendships, I’ll just be the third wheel and is the friend you just say oh yea that sounds nice to, three:what if they jump off the ride then your alone
Well one thing all those have in common is it’s the enemy talking to you, second is if they were true godly friends then they wouldn’t do any of those things to you! They will accept you and be with you, they will stick it out and talk about it, they will stay on that ride because chances are they need you just as much as you need them…..(personally I have a big problem doing the number two fear Always have). Anyway I don’t know what the lesson of this point I was trying to make but I wanted to share my Ah-ha moment I had last night that made me break down in front of the Lord because I knew he was talking to me about it.
Another another thing I noticed about friendships is that just friends are pretty much yes men, they will agree with you and stab you in the back. When you go to rant to them they will just stay quiet and answer accordingly to the responses you give to them. True friends, true godly friends don’t push you from anyone! They tell you what you need to hear even if you didn’t want to hear it (probably because it is the truth, and your don’t want to hear the truth). True friends listen and then try to help!