So as stay at home moms we know the stir crazy feeling we all get when it’s just us and our tornado chaos toddlers or newborns. From never-ending laundry baskets and dirty cloths to the Lego walk of doom (Lego fire walk or what I call death traps) we end up in a small runt. I know when I first started staying at home I felt alone and surrounded by four walls that didn’t give much light. I craved to be out of the house often and hated indoors. They when the husbands gets home we can pawn the munchkins off for a few second of time for us to be alone before they call every three seconds asking what to do. So how do you stay sane, well let’s look at what sane really means. Google defines it (a person) of sound mine; not mad or mentally ill, well are we mentally ill? Sometimes feels that way, at least to me. I often say;
We Are All Mad Here
-The Cheshire Cat, Alice in Wonderland
Here are some ways I tried to stay sane while staying at home! It isn’t always easy but sometimes it’s worth it
First what I would advise is find someone to talk to other than your husband or family member! Even a small text saying hi what’s new with you? to a friend can help keep contact with the outside world and not feel so alone. Talking with adults other than toddlers helps.
Otherwise you find yourself talking to the dog when the kids are down for a nap and the neighbor looks at you like you need help. As funny as that sounds it’s not trust me! It’s better to have that one friend to keep you in the loop of what’s happening outside in the daylight than to be alone. If you don’t have a friend or someone close see about joining a mom’s group at a local church or on Facebook.
Laugh at the Small Stuff
It is always better to laugh at the small stuff than get angry. There are times my children do somethings that I want to yell at them for but I have found those things are so small and can be corrected rather than wasting my energy fighting over it. Using mommies makeup on her doll or letting the dog eat the entire jar of peanut butter. I laugh at myself and at the situation then explain that’s a no no. Later when you look back at it you will feel better knowing you laughed at it than yelled.
Your not Failing
You are not a failure, just know that! You parent in different ways than what everyone else does. You are an awesome mother, ok so you eat gluten-free, or you eat meat, or you use cloth nappies vs disposable, you are a good mother! Suppose you breast feed over bottle feed that’s ok both are good. Unless your physically harming your kids….(which I hope someone isn’t) then you are amazing!
Being a parent is hard but it’s worth it! Repeat and breath, do meditation on this, you are super mom because you are not giving up!
Clean when YOU can
Don’t over exert yourself cleaning! A messy house is ok. Not a disgustingly unlivable situation but messy as in you can tell people live there, not it’s so clean you can’t touch anything. Take a break from folding to play fort with your babies, or hide and seek. Don’t always worry about the house, because you miss out on the good stuff! My house is usually a mess, but it’s livable, dishes are clean and laundry is somewhat done! Food is made and the kids are alive.
I remember being told clean when the babies are asleep then being told sleep when the baby sleeps. So two things conflicting each other and being looked at like crap either way. So clean when you can at your own pace!
Make a game out of everything! If you are cleaning, have them clean with you! Grab a squirt bottle with water in it and have they clean the windows. If you’re wanting to eat cake then play hide and seek, have them go first to hide so you can eat alone. I have tried to make a game out of everything. It doesn’t always work especially with my daughter because she just pouts if it isn’t her way.
I am just now getting use to the idea of going to the park or out on the patio for some outside fun. I as a mom of three I always dreaded going outside in the wide open area’s for my little wild things to run around and
get kidnapped have fun (with a mom of anxiety I always fear the worst) I hover when I am at the park by myself and I don’t mean hover in the good way. However we have a small park by our house that is perfect and small and easy to keep and eye on my two younger ones. My youngest is just now getting to the age of knowing fully the wonders of outside.
I let them play on the patio with a bucket of water, chalk, magic sand, putty (which I highly despise) and other fun things. They enjoy the sunshine while in a contained area of my apartment and I get peace while attempting to clean the house.
PLAY DATES FOR OUR SAKE
I always thought that playdates where for the kids sake on learning and socializing which it is but I hence have learned that it’s for mommy’s sake to. Organize a playdate for an hour with someone you know, they don’t have to have kids but tell them to meet up with you while you are at the park or mall walking around that way your Staying Connected and having Outside Fun.
If you are like many of people who I know, including me at times, that have those kind of kids that; don’t listen, scream bloody murder, or act out in public I would say at least try some of these. Maybe work around it have a playdate in your home, or have the husband watch the kids when he is ok with it and have a girls night for a couple of hours. There is always ways around things. It’s not always easy, I never reach the end of the laundry pile, but it means I take time to be with my minions. I love going out in public but not always with my kids in fear of kidnappers (because my daughter is not the brightest bulb in the box at times) and majority of the time because they act out more.
So for today remember breath, know its ok and that you’re not alone! Message me if you need some one to talk to I am always here.